Thursday, November 12, 2009

stuck {in the middle}

Lets just say that I have a soft spot. Well, I guess maybe several, really, but one may be just a little soft spottier than the rest. You see, I am a middle child. I have lived and breathed "middle childness" throughout my life, and it is for that reason that I adore my Matai Jordan. In all of his insane, impulsive, irrational, emotional perfection......




I understand the frustration that comes with being stuck in the middle. All psychobabble aside, being neither the baby, nor the eldest leaves us with a sense of uncertainty. What exactly is the role of the middle child? I think it is this very question that sends middle children into the whirlwind of confusion that is, and will be, their life.

Can I tell you something? I am terrified. I am completely and utterly filled with fear regarding all things adolescent with my sweet little middy. I tell you with unwavering confidence that my teenage wrath was unparalelled, and I wish the exact opposite of what I provided to my parents upon myself. (They may have a differing opinion. I think the day that Matai smokes his first REAL cigarette or goes on his first tangent of how unfair the world is and that he is sick of being treated like a child, they may just throw a their own honor......for I was a shining star example of the angst ridden teen, in all of my glory. Filled with self pity and rage and every other unpleasantry imaginable. But this isn't about me.









For now, I will enjoy him. I guess that I can worry about the rest later.

1 comment:

  1. I can't stand it!!! Your stories draw me in... wrap me up... and soon I am enamored in the story of your child... I. love. it. You are gifted girl -- and he is lucky to have you as a mom.